


Practice Makes Perfect

by twentysomethingwerewolf



Category: Death Parade (Anime)
Genre: Death with a Happy Ending, Decim and Onna Do It, Decim is bad at social interactions, Decim isnt just married to his work, Decim uses his words, F/M, Ginti is mean to Decim, Marriage, Off screen, canon to episode 5, decim is a dweeb, he doesnt get many opportunities, my precious death babies, nona is laughing about that, probably, too be fair
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-09
Updated: 2015-02-09
Packaged: 2018-03-11 07:23:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3318983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twentysomethingwerewolf/pseuds/twentysomethingwerewolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Decim was not very good with words.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Practice Makes Perfect

**Author's Note:**

> Oh dear God this fandom consists of me, two other English speakers, and An overly obese black cat. 
> 
> Someone save me.
> 
> (Written on my cell phone with no Beta, please read and review.)

.  
.  
.  
Practice Makes Perfect  
.  
.

Decim was not born; not in a traditional sense, at any rate, but he had come into his own gifted in many aspects: intelligent, tall, and a very strong shoulder line, if he did say so himself. And while he felt that truly, his instinct ought to have put him above and beyond when it came to being chosen for social interactions - after all, he was highly in tune with anyone who he spent any real amount of time with - he recognized that when it came to spending any extended period of time with someone, his social skills were... underwhelming. It was just as well as far as he was concerned. His choice of companions was least than satisfactory to say the least, after all, and he didn't really feel as though he was suffering any great loss from spending less time than was absolutely necessary with arbiters like Ginti.

But the black haired woman... The black haired woman was different. 

Perky, pretty Onna. in any other universe Decim and Onna would have never met. Had she made a choice, any other choice in her whole life, differently, they would have not even met in this one. He would have judged her, he would have found her to be less than adequate, and she would have moved out of his life as quickly as she had come. 

But that wasn't the case.

The facts were the facts - because Decim had been unable to judge the woman, she would remain in Quindecim until such a time when he could determine the darkness that lives inside of her heart, or until such a time when she agreed to a roulette against her life. And as such, Decim had noticed for the first time how terribly lacking his social skills truly were. It had never been a cause for alarm before, but now, Decim was vexed. 

Vexed, and vexed that he could not understand why he was so vexed in the first place.

White brows were drawn together in agitation and he met his own reflection in the mirror, taking a deep breath.

He imagined her face, the lines of her mouth, the tilt of her eyes, and Decim tried again.  
"Gold morning, Onna."

He pursed his mouth in displeasure and he went through his closet, only taking his eyes off of his reflection as he began to button his crisp, clean shirt.

"Onna, do have a seat."

He sighed. Way too formal. He could almost hear Nona laughing at him. She had always found his stoic demeanor amusing... which didn't mean the woman would.

He pulled his vest on over his shirt and straightened it out, and pushed his bangs uselessly out of his eyes. 

"Hello Onna."

Simple. Practical.

Decim smiled at himself, a thin-mouthed grin. Why was he even worried about this? Soon, the woman would be gone anyway. 

Sooner or later, everyone left.  
.  
.  
"Why Onna, fancy meeting you here!"

His mouth was twisted into a caricature of a grin in the mirror as he rant a hand over the back of his head, smoothing down his white hair. He twisted his mouth some more, trying out his smile, before he let his face fall flat.

"Where else would she be?" He chastised himself.

"Lovely weather we're having today."

How would he know? 

"Is that a new blouse?"

Decim bashed his head against the wall next to his mirror with a sigh. This was stupid! Decim was a trained arbiter! Decim did not to stupid things!

Looking out of the corner of his eye, he could barely see his reflection in the mirror as he murmured. "You may have been right about the most recent customers we had to Quindecim..."

Even if he knew she really wasn't.  
.  
.

He blushed. He was Decim, an arbiter, trusted with the souls of countless, and he couldn't even manage to look at his own reflection without blushing as he thought of the black haired woman. 

"We've known each other for some time now, and I've found myself growning quite fond of you..."

Too clinical. That wouldn't do.

"Onna, your charms are such that they have even affected the like of me."

Too self centered.

He looked himself dead in the eye, and turned a slight shade of pink.

"You're beautiful."

He covered his eyes and nose, unable to meet his own reflection. It wouldn't do if he couldn't say it without a blush!

He cleared his throat and tried again.

"Onna, would you do me the pleasure of going on a proper date sometime?"  
.  
.  
He reminded himself that he was a reasonable adult and that what he was about to ask of the woman was something that a reasonable adult who had been seeing another reasonable adult in a completely unplatonic manner would eventually ask.

He made eye contact with himself and promptly looked down.

"You can do this, you can..." he told himself, but he spoke to his hands.

"Onna, for some time now I have been thinking that we ought to move our relationship to the next level," his voice cracked, and he went two pitches higher than he intended. "Don't you agree?"

That was terrible. He'd have to try again.

"You know that I've been perplexed in the past by the very human notion of exchanging bodily fluids, but kissing you has proven to be most enjoyable, I was wondering if you would be interested in participating in coitus with me?"

No, if he remembered correctly - and he always remembered correctly - Nona had banned him from ever using the word coitus again after the incident with the lovers who had died simultaneously during intercourse when their ceiling had collapsed. No good.

He looked up at the mirror and cocked and eyebrow. "Hey, baby..."

He shook his head. That was just ridiculous! The woman would never fall for something so-

Knock, knock, knock.

"Decim? May I come in?"

Decim's face heated and he almost turned her away when he realized that maybe he did not need to use his words at all. 

Leaning bodily against the wall with his most practiced "come hither" expression, Decim opened the door and smiled.

And no words were necessary after all.  
.  
.  
There was weight in his pocket, and a heavy weight on his heart. Decim had never been more concerned about the socially acceptable way to do things, and his desire to make sure that everything was absolutely perfect was not helping.

"You know that I have cherished our time together."

He stopped to brush an errant hair behind his ear and contemplated, not for the first time, getting a hair cut - though he would probably get that taking care of after he took care of this.

"I have always found you utterly enchanting, even when you still thought that the memories of the deceased alone were enough to weigh a life by."

No. Better to leave the past in the past. While he was at it, perhaps there would be better times to discuss the dead.

"I understand that there is a period of time that people who are in intimate relationships spend together before it becomes necessary to take the other 'off the market,' as it were."

That sounded lame, even to his untrained ears.

"Did you know that penguins mate for life, and that the male presents a pebble to his chosen mate... like this one!"

Interesting fact, he conceded to himself, but the Woman was likely more interested in romantic things.

"Marriage these days is really just about the bonding of assets; you know, mine are in perfect order. Perhaps that could benefit you?"

What an unromantic notion, Decim thought.

"Would you like to make our pair-bond permanent?"

He stared at himself in the mirror, pleased. Perhaps that was the one?

"Oh, for crying out loud, Decim!" Ginti yelled through his closed bathroom door, "Just ask her if she'll marry you!" He pounded heavily against the thick wood. "And hurry up, I need to use it!" 

Well, Decim thought. At least he was more refined than some people.  
. . .  
Decim straightened his tie in the mirror and smiled.

Affairs such as these were highly irregular in the after life, so while it was a small affair, everyone he was acquainted with weye all waiting outside for him - for him, and for her. His colleagues, his superiors, and even a few like his Onna, humans who had wound up in between world's and made their lives here.

He studied himself in the mirror and smiled.

There was no need for practice; when the time came, he knew exactly what he was going to say.

"I do."  
.

**Author's Note:**

> Fanfiction is an effort of love. No money is made. 
> 
> If you liked this, please leave a kudos. 
> 
> If you want to read more like this, please leave a review.


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